There was a time in my life when I was painfully uncomfortable with my looks. I felt small and awkward. Boyish and goofy. The polar opposite of pretty. In fact, next to my graceful and womanly older sisters, I wanted so desperately to fade away. Most of the time I did just that, I shrank away from cameras and onlookers and sat close to mama. For many years, I was a voyer to everyone else’s fun at the party.
What I didn’t know at the time was, our beauty is not surface. It literally comes out of us. Joyous, or melloncolly, mysterious, or brazen, shy or roucus – our beauty is first an emotion. It wasn’t until my late 30’s I realized I could use my feelings (a ton of which I had) to ignite my beauty. There is nothing more gorgeous than a woman who highlights the very thing that bubbles up from inside of her. For me it’s enthusiasm – I can’t keep it at bay and thankfully it is the very thing that will keep me forever young and glowing.
When you feel a certain way, jot it down so you can remember it. Keep a journal of what’s going on in your head and heart. Add one more category of Notes in your phone and each time you feel something, type in exactly that feeling. I like to clip pictures of anything that catches my eye, and usually the things that do catch my eye are the very things that resemble my feelings. By the end of each month, my black Moleskine is filled with quotes, photos, even color swatches – things that reflect who I am (or want to be).
Make up and product can be the perfect tool to express your inner feelings. Use them to amplify your emotions (aka, your inner beauty). Take your own ‘black book’ of mood memories, and study it. Once you’ve gotten to know yourself on that deeper level, choose make up, lotions and potions that reflect who you are. In the words of my dear friend, Bevy Smith, “Beauty is what bubbles and pops.”